if the netherlands win, ill go to college.

i cant wait until God isnt this idea breathing down my neck, prohibiting me from doing all the things i want to do, and making me do all the things i dont.
i cant wait until He is no longer a slot machine. if i pray the exact combination of words He is looking for, ill be granted my wish.
i cant wait until He is no longer charlie, calling me a few times a month giving me instructions and guidance, while He sips His martini on His hammock on the beach. i cant wait until i hear from Him more often than that.

i cant wait until His grace is enough, His mercies are new every morning, His thoughts for me are more than i can count, He is involved in every step of my life, He is an everpresent help in a time of trouble.
i wonder if He gets excited about the world cup and laughs at my stupid jokes. i wonder what His favorite drink is, if He prefers wine or champagne. i wonder if He even has taste buds. i wonder if He wants me to go to college or not. i wonder if He gives a crap. i wonder if He's mad at me for saying that.
i dont like this non-god i "serve".
i want to want Him, but it hasnt rained in a while and i dont know what to do.
i hope God doesnt play golf or wear plaid shirts.

ive been wikipedia-ing people i think are fascinating. so, im going to write multiple wikipedia articles on my life. what it could or could not be like. as if i have any control over that.

yesterday, i spent 45 seconds thinking about a hole puncher. life is getting pretty out of control. i cant wait to go back to kenya.

i cant wait to see the sunset.